Emily over at Never Bored of Bubbles has had a fab idea for a blog post, and she is asking other mummy bloggers for their answers too (which is great, because it means I don’t have to shamelessly steal her idea, I get to legitimately post my answers!).
If you could go on a parenting version of Room 101, what three things would you throw away? Three things in the world of motherhood that I hate are…
1 – Gender Stereotypes
Georgie has a lot of clothes that are pink, or have pink pictures on. And there is no doubt that some of these clothes are adorable. But, she also has red, blue, purple, green (and so on) clothes as well… but it drives me bonkers that these are so hard to find! It’s impossible to escape the colour pink when you have a baby girl. I’ve nothing against the colour, it’s just overtaken everything a bit!
Luckily we’re still at the stage where toys are generally just colourful, but as she gets older I find it a little bit infuriating that there are “girls toys” and “boys toys”, and so often the boy’s version of a toy just looks nice & normal, but the girl’s version is exclusively in shades of pink. For example, the Fisher-Price Bounce and Spin Zebra… there is a lovely actual zebra coloured one, and then a girly version that frankly looks ill, and inexplicably has an RRP of £10 higher! Why do we have to pay a premium for that colour scheme (and who would?!). The whole thing drives me up the wall.
2 – Your Social Shift
There are no two ways of saying it – when you become a mother your circle of friends changes dramatically. You make new casual friends at baby groups; friends who you can have a moan to about the difficult bits of parenthood – they understand why you can obsess over the contents of nappies or the length of your baby’s naptimes. But the conversation rarely goes past your kids to what is going on with you.
And then you have your old friends. The ones who don’t invite you to much anymore because they perceive that you’re stuck at home with the baby. And I’m not saying I want to go our clubbing or late night drinking… because I don’t. But it would be nice to be included for just little stuff like hanging out at their houses for a bit, or going to the cinema. Or something! Having a baby doesn’t actually mean that you’re stuck indoors for ever. Babies are portable! I’m not saying I’d take Georgie to a drunken house party, but (and I’m saying this now before bbq season starts) I’m quite happy carting her around to people’s houses for a chilled out catch up session!
Happily, it’s not all doom & gloom. Some of my old friends are still fantastic, and a couple have even gotten closer since I had the baby (she is like a magnet for cuddles and visits in some cases!). And this makes me happy. But please don’t forget about me just because I’m a mum now! I can leave the house.. I can even leave the baby here sometimes, she has a Daddy too!
3 – The “you’re a bad mother” comments or looks
I’m not saying that people say outright that I’m a bad mother, but I am sick to death of people telling me that I’m doing something wrong. It makes me feel so judged when someone tells me that I should be doing this, not that. Giving me bad looks when I give Georgie “adult food” from my plate when we’re eating out instead of mush from a jar. Asking me if we’re stopping breastfeeding soon, because she’s nearly one. Telling me that she should be doing this or that by now. It just makes you want to scream!
Georgie is a happy, healthy, well-developed little girl. She & I both still enjoy breastfeeding and it is still her best source of nutrition. She is enthusiastic about food and baby led weaning is going incredibly well.. the only thing she is in fact fussy about is baby food, which is just not as nice as proper food. Have you tried it?! I am a good mother, so please, strangers in the street, stop making me feel like you think I’m not!
Do you agree with my choices?
Wow, I rambled and ranted a bit there. Sorry! What three things would you put in Mums 101? Don’t forget to do your own version & link it up at Emily’s blog! 🙂
I definitely agree with you choices Zoe! This week I have been looking for some little summer kick about shoes for my 2 year old. The choice for girls seems to be butterflies, hearts, or flowers. The boys shoes have cute animals or dinosaurs and actually my 2 year old (strangely enough) is much more excited by a monkey than a butterfly despite being a girl!!
I am the only one of my old friends to have started a family so I know what you mean about point number 2. I have to say my friends have really made a great effort, it more comes with having to say no so often, I worry they may give up inviting me all together!
And as for number 2, I was all about the ice cubes and home-made when baby weaning, but sometimes you just don't have time so I did use jars and pouches too. And I got the looks for that!! xx
What catagory of friends do I fall into? Baby group? xxx
urgh I can't bear you're a bad mother stares! my big boy whose almost 3 had a full on meltdown in the supermarket the other day to the point that I took a video so I could show him later on to try and teach him about his behaviour and the looks I got from other mums as I carried him out kicking and dreaming like a rugby ball – I couldn't believe it! Once I saw a mum struggling to get a screaming child into his car seat and I rushed over to help and did his straps up straightaway mostly through the shock of a stranger doing his seat up! But not one person offered to help carry my bag out even though I was so obviously struggling! Great post!
I think they are definately good choices!
can relate perfectly to all three x
Oh, the friend thing makes me so sad. I miss my old friends and don't see why they can't just pop over to have a glass of wine and a catch up. I thought they'd be excited about the new little person but they just see me as 'boring mum' now. Great choices!