As bloggers, we like to paint a rosy picture of our lives. Or, a least, a lot of bloggers seem to have perfect lives with angelic children, and I’m sure that just simply ain’t so. The secret blogger at tots100 even went so far as to admit that they lie to make things look better on their blog.
When children are naughty, we’re supposed to believe it’s always in a wildly comical manner, recounted in such a way that has you thinking the parent in question must have laughed his/her head off, instead of letting a few frustrated tears slip out, or even losing their temper and having a little scream.
The only place we let things slip is twitter. Have you noticed that? Our little corner of the Internet for complaining about the moments our sweet children are taken away from us in the blink of an eye, seemingly replaced with something you might find lurking under the bed in a horror movie.
On twitter, our guard is down & there is a sense of solidarity, especially in the early hours of the mornings. We are all in this together. Maybe it’s because of the way twitter doesn’t seem as permanent as a blog (though of course it is). With your 140 characters, a few people can hear you scream, but it doesn’t tarnish the perfect picture of your life that is your blog.
On blogs, children are “independent & exploring their boundaries,” instead of “right little brats”. We have kids who “know their own minds” instead of ones who are simply being naughty little monsters.
Our love for them is always unconditional, but no one ever mentions the moments when you’re not 100% sure you even like your child for that second (but then they come and kiss you, and of course you do!). The terrifying, if fleeting, moments when you are afraid you’re doing this all wrong, because your child seems to feel the need to misbehave one day out of every week.
A huge part of why I keep a blog is that it’s my journal, so I can look back & remember my life with the kids… and I don’t want to forget our struggles whilst only remembering our highs. Looking back at my past with a pair of rose-coloured sunglasses on is not how I want things to be in the future, when I read this blog, so honesty needs to be the name of the game.
I love to take photos, but some of the photos on my computer seem very different to those I see on a lot of blogs. My photos of Georgie playing often feature a backdrop of utter chaos, after a day or two of play with no whip around & tidy up. I have a photo from my pregnancy (more than one, in fact) where I look ill & tired… Yet I’m sure I’ve only ever seen perfect bump shots with “glowing” mums online.
I want this blog to be an accurate representation of how things are in my life, so I am going to post & photograph more of our reality. Capture tantrums as well as happy playtime, and tears as well as smiles. Hopefully, sharing the tough moments of life will help me deal with them, and make me appreciate the great ones.
So this is me, pledging to share our difficulties as well as everything else, because that’s the way life is, and it’s the way I want to remember it.
@tots100 a post about honesty & transparency in blogging: Capturing the lows as well as the highs
Honesty is always the best policy, Its always, tears, tantrums, smiles, mess and mayhem in our house, I wouldnt want it any other way 🙂
A little mayhem is good for the soul!
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It’s a good pledge, everyone has high & lows but like you say, some don’t like to share it… I do 🙂
Honesty is the best policy 😀
well done Zoe. as you know I always post the truth and it helps me to see how things have changed. no one wants to admit they find it hard or want to sometimes throw their little darlings out the window, but only painting a rosy picture of things can be hard on more than just yourself. we have all been there and I think it is important as mums that we stand together and admit things aren’t 100% all the time. sending my love x
Thanks for the comment! Things aren’t always easy 🙂
I like to read about real mums like me, that let their children watch tv so they can have 5 mins peace or get on with a job, that don’t spend all day in activities to “develop” their children etc. These type of bloggers just make me feel inferior.
I’m with you on the inferior feeling! Their lives simply CANNOT be that perfect and shiny and tidy all the times. There just aren’t enough hours in the day!